Wrangler Dani

Relationships are a funny business.  It seems to me that any relationship with another human is like spraying a Miracle-Gro and Weed Killer cocktail on a poor struggling sap of a flower. We nurture and murder each other, all in one.  Granted it’s very efficient, getting all of our hurts and loves settled by the same group of friends, acquaintances and family – though not always fun to find that the same people who you have felt loved and uplifted by can tear you down and beat you up within months, if not minutes.

Tonight I hung out with some of the “fab gals” in my life. (Thanks to Brooke for giving them such a great title).  We had a great time with fried food, boy giggles and crazy stories.  We went to see Ghosts of Girlfriends Past, which is essentially about this: Love hurts, but is ultimately worth it.  The main character spends the entire film being skeezy and gross and running from feeling anything to avoid feeling something unpleasant.  Finally he realizes that in his search to not feel something awful, he’s missed the wonderful as well.

I had a wonderful night with good friends, and yet found myself dwelling on hurts from one friend (who wasn’t even at our little gathering) on my way home.  I found myself thinking up rebuttals to hurtful words, and wasting a perfectly good evening on something awful – a friendship gone south based on miscommunication and over-reactions.  Because of my heightened senses, I found myself annoyed with my loving husband for not answering his phone, worried about tomorrow, on and on…. letting the Weed Killer overcome the healthy dose of Miracle-Gro I’d just experienced.

My worship CD was playing in the background as I was mulling over the Weed Killers, and this song came on:

I realized that I was making a choice. A choice with how to use my thoughts, how to look at Love, how to treat my friends and my husband.  I was choosing, in that moment, whether or not I was going to follow… though none go with me, though no matter how strong the Miracle-Gro, sometimes Weed Killer wins out.  Love is a risky business. I’ll get hurt. Sometimes people are unpredictable, and sometimes they don’t listen to me, won’t understand me, will say mean things. But sometimes they call even when I’m horrible at answering my phone, love me when even I know I’m being lame, hug me even when I forgot deoderant and encourage me when I’m down.

Daily, I choose to Love. Daily, I choose to rein in my thoughts. Daily, I choose Miracle-Gro over Weed Killer. Daily, I choose to follow Jesus.