Wrangler Dani

I picked “Sneezy” as my dwarf/mood of the day, because he’s obviously the most off the wall, and it’s Wednesday, so I need a little levity.

Also, I’ve felt like I’ve had an acre of grass clippings up my nose all day, and it’s getting a little old – so I can kind of identify with poor Sneezy.

So. Things that make me Sneezy, and (bonus!) a few random nose stories, since I’m not allergic to anything, and this list will soon get boring and very short:

• Bleach. Every time I clean my bathroom I sneeze like crazy. This kind of happens a lot, since I kind of have a clean fetish.
• I was probably 8 years old the last time I stuck a marble up my nose. I think I had some vague recollection that it had been “fun” before, (in the way that squirming, sitting on your bathroom floor and desperately trying to get a large, round object out of a small nose can be fun… I guess.) At any rate, I think my schnoz had grown a bit since the last time I’d tried this trick – let’s just say it ended with a combo of tweezers, pliers, my dad’s strong hands, my mom threatening to go to the ER, and many tears on my part.
• Laughing so hard that you get whatever you’re drinking up your nose can be very painful. This summer, I did it to such an extreme in one instance, that the thought flashed across my mind: “You could die laughing. Just like this.” It’s a good way to go, I guess.
• One time I caught a bug in my mouth and sneezed it out my nose. I feel like a 6th grader on the search for cool points, but it really happened. True story.
• When other people get in sneezing fits, I get in hiccup fits, ALL THE TIME. But scaring me won’t make it stop. I promise.
• I’ve always been really grateful that I’m not allergic to dogs, cats, horses, grass, hay, open skies, sunshine, coffee, good books, Mexican food, candlelight, good-smelling soap, warm hugs, star-gazing, apple pie, Life cereal, rivers, daisies, the ocean, good exercise and wonderful people. Because I love all these things, and allergies would just mess it up.