Wrangler Dani

Writer, editor, wife, adoptive mama and cowgirl living in beautiful Central Oregon.

Washing

When we were moving into our new apartment, boxes were exploding all over the house, crumpled paper littered our new carpet and questions were coming from every direction: does this item go into storage? In the house? In a cupboard? What do you want to do with this bowl/book/pan/trinket?

After a week of moving out, driving north and moving in, I didn’t want to answer those questions or think about anything. All I wanted to do was to wash dishes. It wasn’t necessary or sensible, but it sounded therapeutic and normal. I wanted to take a soapy sponge to something and see it transform from neglected and dirty to sparkling and ready for a new culinary adventure. Washing dishes and doing laundry both make me feel accomplished – the hum of the washing machine or the sight of an empty sink give me a feeling of settled-ness, like my little house is in order and my world is all right.

I was thinking about washing dishes and doing laundry this morning, because I am frustrated and ungrateful and yearning for more – and I am in need of the worship captured in a clean plate or folded underwear. I need to engage in seemingly small acts of faithfulness and kindness to keep my heart on course and my mind from wallowing.

The hard truth is that I don’t know how long it will take to accomplish the dream of a house and kidlets and everything I hope for. The harder truth is that none of those dreams are promised to me, as tough as that is to admit. So what am I doing while we wait in the desert, yearning for the Promised Land?

I think there’s more to washing dishes and doing laundry than simple cleanliness – it’s an act of hope, of worship, of steadfast faith. I believe that I should serve and clean and and work and write and enjoy because I believe that it’s going to get better. I believe that God is good. I believe that my dreams are not unfounded. I believe that the future is worth washing my good glassware for, and wearing a freshly-washed skirt to celebrate.

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